Criticism can be more helpful than praise

By Jimmy Williams

A sage once uttered, then recorded, words to this effect: "People ask for criticism, but what they really want is praise."

Whether it is a piece of hand-wrought craftsmanship, chocolate pie or a garden, the question is offered, "What can I do to make it better?"

The best answers you can give are, in this order, "Make the head a little smaller." "Use a little less chocolate and a little more sugar." And "For goodness sake, get that wad of gone-over tulip foliage out of the way and let the phlox take over."

These are, of course, hypothetical settings. But you get the idea, I hope. Criticism can be, for the hearer, of infinitely more value than praise. After all, what good is the praise? Perhaps a fleeting feeling of satisfaction results, but the key word here is fleeting. A day later, given no more than praise, the rotten tulip leaves still sully that part of the garden. The suggestion that they need removing, however, might result in that very thing happening.

Perhaps this isn’t textbook protocol for winning friends and influencing people, but if the one involved is already your friend, you might get away with it, to his or her benefit.

This kind of thing is more often practiced in far less blatant fashion. For instance, the garden visitor could have said, about the tulip foliage, "What will you be replacing the spring bulbs with this year?"

Such a gentle nudge might make the scales fall from the gardener’s eyes and reveal to him the shabby tulip leaves. He might then yank them out and plop into their place a couple of marigolds or, at least, let the aforementioned phlox take over the void.

Most visitors to our garden sigh the obligatory oohs and aahs, but, hey, I’ve got thick skin. I invite you to come in and tell it like it is.

Tracy DiSabato-Aust is a 20-year career landscape designer and lecturer from Ohio. She stays on the speaking circuit at plant meetings and symposia the year round. I have heard her a couple of times and found her to be knowledgeable indeed when it comes to perennials and their care.

It is appropriate, then, that she wrote a book on the subject. The Well-Tended Perennial Garden, from Timer Press, has hit the market in recent weeks. It is undoubtedly the most detailed treatise I’ve read on the subject of perennial care, particularly in the area of running, deadheading and pinching back.

Most books skim over lightly or even omit any reference to the wonders that can be achieved by proper and timely cutting back of various perennials. There are works aplenty on pruning of woody plants, but only this one gives such attention to perennials.

Ms. DiSabato-Aust isn’t a poetic writer in the manner of, say, Christopher Lloyd, but her advice comes from the heart…and hands. She is an avid gardener herself and there’s no second-hand information here.

A listing of individual perennials is toward the back of the book, and proper pruning procedures for each are given in detail, as well as the more traditional instructions on dividing, soil improvement, etc.

An appendix has schedule for perennial border maintenance in each month of the year, though this must be adjusted somewhat for our more southern climate that for her Ohio location.

Have a bookstore order the book for you, at $29.95,or order directly from Timber Press at 133 SW Second Avenue, Suite 450, Portland, Oregon 97204-3527 (add $5.50 shipping and handling fee), or get on the web at www.timerpress.com.